Horse Sense

Cowboy vs. Dude
By Ryan Underwood

t h e f u n f i l e:
Outback Boredom Busters

Watch Birds
Pack binoculars and keep a bird log. The Nature Company’s Guide to Birding (Time-Life Books, $24.95) is a terrific resource book.

Forecast the Weather
Learn about forecasting in Cliff Jacobson’s Camping Secrets (ICS Books, $7.95). Frogs croak and the smoke from your campfire hangs low when rain is on the way, but a heavy dew in early morning suggests 12 hours of good weather. Keep a journal of your own predictions, then record what actually happens.

Do Scat
Young kids get jazzed about excrement, which happens to be all over the trails. Paul Rezendes’s Tracking and the Art of Seeing (Camden House Publishing, $19.95) provides all the information required to get out there and find your own evidence of animal life.

Keep a Flower Journal
Wildflowers die a nanosecond after being picked, so pack markers and a journal and sketch the flowers you find. Bring along a flower book to identify what you’re drawing.

Sweep for Bugs
Bring a small net on a pole and a bug book. Gently brush through the grasses and wildflowers. Catalog in a journal all the bugs you find, then let them go. (See page 17 for nifty bug gear).

–Lisa Twyman Bessone

To the untrained eye-or the eye trained by Hollywood-it can be hard to tell a real cowboy from a dude. But no matter how authentic the outfit or the attitude, there are unmistakable differences:
cowboy

COWBOY

DUDE

The cowboy rolls his own
cigarettes.

The cowboy’s belt buckle is
big enough to display his
initials.

The cowboy two-steps.

To the cowboy, “ranch” is a
noun.

The cowboy would never,
ever eat or wear eggplant.

The cowboy has boot spurs.

The cowboy wears plaid.

The cowboy eats everything
with ketchup.

The dude rolls his abs.

The dude’s is big enough to
receive DirecTV.

The dude twelve-steps.

To the dude, “ranch” is a
flavor.

The dude would, and drive
it, too.

The dude has bone spurs.

The dude wears Burberry.

The dude eats everything
with aioli.