My Dream Adventure Rig Is a Franken-Vehicle from Facebook Marketplace

My trusty little six-cylinder 2010 Toyota Camry is known around my town as the caballo incognito: a dark horse that accesses trailheads where it has absolutely no business being. I detest readymade Sprinter vans. Living in a ski town, I see them each and every day. Sure, I understand the practicality of having a full solar setup, a bougie kitchen, and outlets for a heated blanket. I’m certain it’s lovely to toss a log on your built-in wood stove as you camp in a quasi-legal and definitely-in-the-way pullout on the town’s scenic loop. But to me, these kitted-out, prefab vans signify the homogenization of adventure. They are easy, safe, sanitized adventure vehicles that ensure everyone can have fun outdoors in the exact same way.

That’s why, when I lust after my dream adventure vehicle, I dive into the strange world of backwoods modified rigs whose spiritual and actual nexus lives on Facebook Marketplace. The denizens of the marketplace are tinkerers, magicians, yahoos, and scammers, kindred spirits who all coexist in a marvelous ecosystem containing deals and deathtraps.

I’ve spent years collecting photos of these vehicles, hoping that one day I would have the funds and the chutzpah to purchase one. After all, what is the great American road trip without the car being its own adventure? Here’s a peek into my collection of the wackiest Facebook Marketplace adventure vehicles out there.

The Mazda Miata Convertible Buggy: For the Climber Who Wants to Arrive in Style $3,200

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. I first spotted the suspension lift and manual transmission, which will provide clearance over snow and rocks as well as deliver more precise power at low speeds. The oversized rear wing will maximize downforce and the roll cage is vital if you decide to pretend you’re Ken Block on the winding roads that lead to the crag—not recommended. If you do end up flipping this rig on black ice, the bucket seats and custom racing harness should keep you as safe as possible. With 195,000 miles it’s still a steal at just over three grand. A true hobbyist’s dream.

Argo Sherp: For Off-Road Dreams Without a Budget $120,000

Your Subaru Outback is not the off-roader you think it is. But this tank on wheels can get to the ends of the earth. It will also land you squarely on your local conservation org’s shit list, so play by the rules, please. Its 71-inch wheels run low pressures so traction won’t be an issue on sand, snow, or gravel. The Sherp has room for six passengers, so if buying this behemoth sends you into debt, you can just open up a cat skiing operation.

1986 Subaru Baja: For Skiers Who Head South of the Border When Spring Comes $4,800

Cha brah, we know you surf slush in Mammoth until the swell hits Rosarito. That’s why we found the perfect rig to bridge the gap between land and sea. It’s kitted with a topper and a ski rack, so you can crash on BLM land in Bishop and catch last chair when the fog of… whatever it is you’re into wears off come 3 P.M. Then when you tire of the cold, you can cast off the topper and load the pickup bed with shorties and rip down to Mexico. At $4,800, this one’s probably within your parent’s budget.

2012 Motooka Land Speed Racer: For the SLC Skier Who Wants to Get to Snowbird. Fast. $40,000

If it’s at home in the Bonneville Salt Flats, it should do just fine in the salted parking lots of Utah’s premiere ski area. This skinny cruiser was built with a jet engine to break the land speed record. Beating traffic to the base of Little Cottonwood Canyon should be a breeze. Plus, it’s skinny enough that it can fit in the half-parking spot gap between the two rude 4Runners. Your skis can easily fit inside the elongated cockpit, and you can simply swap the desert slicks for Blizzak snow tires to gain confidence on the slippery road. Think of the thrill of trying to turn your way up the winding road; we’re not even sure there’s a steering column in this rocket ship!